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A 2005 paper by University of Southern California sociologist Julie Albright quotes Freuds old saw about cigars and cigarettes being phallus substitutes: To put it plainly: the fetish is a substitute for the womans (mothers) phallus which the little boy once believed in and does not wish to forego. The fetish as symbol of the mothers penis comes also to represent her desire, thereby affirming that her desire lies with him and not with the father. Maybe, but Freud was so wrong about so much

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